Praying Over Your Foster Children

I knew a woman that read through the whole Bible aloud while pregnant with each of her children.  I loved that idea to connect with your unborn child.  My son heard many a lesson plan in the womb, and I would tell my belly that he’d come out smarter than a 5th grader since I taught middle school.

Things are a little different with our foster children.  We don’t have the 9 month luxury of praying over them before meeting them.  In the foster care world, you find out they exist, and then they arrive at your doorstep a day or so later.  With our current placement, it was almost as if a stork dropped her off- there was a knock on the door, a baby exchanged hands, and that was that.  The gravity and sudden responsibility of doing right by someone else’s child doesn’t escape me.  Every day I pray the following things:

• Wisdom– James 1:5 says, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault and it will be given to you.”  When I know that a child has had it rough, I would love more than anything to step in and be an infallible presence of perfect love and infinite wisdom.  I can’t be infallible, but it is comforting to know God promises to infuse us with wisdom if we ask it.  So I ask it.  A lot.
• Stability– I pray for stability both in the child’s home life and for their time in foster care that they won’t be moved from home to home or experience multiple disruptions.  I pray for a sense of security, belonging, and safety.
• Identity– This is probably what I find myself praying for the most.  I want the children in my care to have a sense of belonging, to know who they are, to feel connected with their heritage, and have a sense of place.
• The Parents– Romans 5:8 “ But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”  I’m always hoping that parents will redeem themselves, integrate into a supportive community, and be able to turn things around.  Whether the case is moving towards reunification or adoption, this prayer still applies because there is always hope.
•   Development– These kids come with issues.  I pray for insight in how to navigate all of it and for the child to overcome trauma, learn coping skills, and build new neural pathways.  I pray for normal development and the ability to identify and address any issue or diagnoses.
• The future– While all of our futures are unknown, there is more concern for those who are at-risk.  When I think about years down the road for these kids, I pray against addiction and for healthy relationships, educational support, and positive role models.  I hope they can look at what’s gone before them and view it as a cautionary tale instead of falling into step with it.

My list could probably go on, but these are my 6 constants along with a revolving door of other requests and praises.  Of course all of it is enveloped in a prayer for them to be loved and nurtured, and while they are with me, that I can exemplify Christ-like love and do right by them.